Unfortunately I have a very hazy memory of Mini Meltdown’s birth as I was rather (make that extremely) woozy on pain relief but I do remember looking down and thinking that they were pulling rather hard on his little head in an effort to deliver him (he had a ventouse delivery). They the took him away to give him a quick once over and a clean and then they asked me if I wanted to hold him. I was so away with the fairies I doubted I had the co-ordination to hold him safely so I asked them to give him to his daddy to hold instead. Which turned out to be a good move, as the next ‘hiccup’ we faced was stopping me from bleeding.
While I was happily listening to daddy chatting away to Mini Meltdown (I do remember being proud at what a natural Mr Meltdown was), I was also dimly aware of some activity at the bottom of my bed and someone pressing on my tummy – Mr Meltdown reported later that the doctors had quite a battle to stop the bleeding, which involved a gang of worried-looking medical staff doing their thing and repeatedly changing the absorbant pads placed on the floor to soak up my blood as they filled up……
Eventually, the bleeding was brought under control and about 45 mins after the birth, I was wheeled into recovery and finally met Mini Meltdown. Again I don’t remember the details – drugs do funny things to your perception and memory – but I was able to hold MM for the first time and enjoy some skin to skin contact with him.
Those long years of dreaming about being a mum finally became reality, but for me, there wasn’t a ‘moment’ like you often see in inspirational posts online, when life seems to take on new meaning when you hold your child for the first time. In fact, the after-effects of a difficult labour combined with lots of strong medication, loss of blood, lack of sleep and the whole newness of the experience left me in a surreal dreamlike state that lasted for the next few days.
Adventures with Mini Meltdown 